i never noticed the colour of my skin under the moonlight before. or how my arms sway back and forth when i walk.
a whirlwind of leaves has never felt like a hurricane before.
and i’ve never felt this safe to walk with my eyes closed.
the numbness. it’s good.
the pain. the guilt. the longing. the self loathing. all gone.
not thinking about you- about anything, is just so wonderful.
i feel like i’m in a dream.
one that i don’t ever want to wake up from.
but. i will wake up.
and everything that i long to forget will begin to rain down on me like an unexpected thunderstorm that i just can't stop or hide from.
until the next time..
i am sorry
i wish it didn't have to be like this.
